Day 1

Welcome to abstinent day #1, again. I have lost track of how many times I have been here.
Today was a good day though. Surprisingly so considering I was unable to sleep hardly at all last night. One of the side effects of filling myself with flour and sugar. My mind goes a million miles an hour and my body is revved up with the fake energy rush. It was a horrible night. It is amazing how sensitive my body is to those substances. Aside form being unable to sleep I have gone through painful gas that leaves me literally unable to cope. I have almost had to cancel my childrens classes and activities because I was in to much pain to get out of bed. My mouth goes horribly dry and nothing makes it go away. Believe me you don't want to hear about the diarrhea... Heart burn doesn't happen all the time, but it does occur late at night when I eat.
Surprised that I would willingly do this to myself knowing the pain and discomfort I will be going through? Yeah, so am I. I do think about it before taking the first bite, but the side effects don't happen every time and most of the time I take my chances and hope for the best.
On more positive notes, I adore my new sponsor. So much different than my last one. she is kind, understanding and supportive. It is a good feeling not to have to dread calling my sponsor every morning. This one also talks.... a very refreshing thing to discover, rather than me having to fill the whole 15 min with silence on the other end. I do feel like my new sponsor is trying to help me rather than find fault with every choice I make. There is hope with this sponsor that I never felt with my other two. Is it bad that this is my third sponsor in 6 months, not including my temporary sponsor that I started with? Hopefully I will have this sponsor for a long time.
I went shopping and pizza was calling. Prayed the whole time, "Heavenly Father, please help me remain abstinent". Came so close, too close. I have to remember not to stroke those thoughts or dwell on them, for thoughts become actions if we are not careful. Proud to say that by the grace of God I am still abstinent through day 1.
Went to Yoga today and it was an amazing practice! I made it through all of the postures and have really improved. My balance on my foot that just had surgery is still off, but that will improve with time.
During the practice the instructor said something that stuck with me. she told us to take time to "honor our bodies". The choices I make in regards to my body can bring honor to my body and show appreciation to Heavenly Father for this amazing gift he has given me. I expect a lot of my body. It has created and borne and sustained six children. Such an amazing feat. My body deserves to be honored and respected.
By the grace of God there go I, to another day of abstinence god willing.